Now we know Jesus hates wrinkled clothes

I never iron anything. Perhaps I need to change my habits. It appears that Our Lord appeared on an iron. The headline on a story from the Boston Globe says it all, “Methuen woman sees Jesus on bottom of her clothes iron”. Sure, cynics will say that it’s just a burn mark. And those same people refused to see the Virgin Mary on a grilled cheese sandwich, despite the vibrant faith displayed by a true believer who bought the precious sandwich for $28,000.

Why is it that Jesus and Mary always appear to Roman Catholics? Because there are so many of them? Because they are the true religion, the only ones worthy of these special revelations? Because they are the only ones who believe in this stuff? Why don’t Anglicans ever get these glimpses of the divine? I’m willing to give a prize for just that.

I’d like to see an Anglican version of one of these epiphanies. So here’s the deal. 7WD is launching our first-ever contest. Email me a photo of Jesus or Mary appearing to an Anglican or in an Anglican church building in some unusual spot, and you’ll receive a prize. Tree bark, sandwiches, window reflections, and (now) irons are void. Here’s a gallery of “been there, done that”. You have to have a new one. I’m expecting something classy. What’s the prize, you say? Well, you’ll get top billing right here on 7WD. (Unless you prefer to remain anonymous.) You can find our email address on the About page. Let the contest begin!

Another thing: can someone please advise me on ironing issues? When I wear cotton-poly blend clergy shirts with no need or ironing, do I risk divine wrath?

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3 Responses

  1. How could I have missed this? Oh, yeah, my Globe was drenched this morning because the paper guy neglected to double-bag it. Thanks for unleashing the 7WD legions. I just know something will turn up and I will check back here every two minutes throughout the night. I don’t want to miss any breaking news.

    On the clergy shirt thing, you don’t risk divine wrath as long as you order from Wippell. Anything less and watch out.

  2. Laura says:

    That image of Mary thing is so old hat. St. Agatha is all the rage these days, being the patron saint for women with breast cancer (and I bet she’s even busier now, with the mammogram cutbacks). And, OK, so she’s not Anglican, but I don’t care. Because who doesn’t want to see an image of the miraculous breasts of St. Agatha? Plus a completely accurate retelling of the tale. Check it out:


  3. Found it! I just saw Jesus in my bathroom mirror! Oh, wait, that was just my God-complex.